by Troop Atomic Mommy
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Are you worried that the time with your kids is passing you by? Perhaps you’re scared that you’re simply not finding ways to get enough quality time with them? Read this quick guide on possible issues causing this feeling and the steps to help you get through it.
#1 Divorce
First, it is worth exploring the impact that a divorce can have on the time you spend with your kids. If you don’t have joint custody, then you could find that you don’t get to see your child nearly as often as you would like. The best way to deal with this is to make sure that divorce remains as amiable as possible. Both parents need to make sure they are working to guarantee they have equal time with their children.
Take it from a mom who’s been divorced and it wasn’t an amicable split… the kids absorb that negative energy and travel with it back and forth between their two new domiciles. This in turn, affects their abilities to enjoy the allotted time with their parents. So, be better than I ever was at trying to keep it civil with the ex.
#2 Low Energy
It’s possible that you just don’t have a lot of energy as a parent. This might be because you’re not getting enough sleep or it could be something else. It could be something more serious, such as a hormone imbalance or vitamin deficiency.
When hormone imbalances and vitamin deficiencies occur in the body, you will feel a great deal of symptoms. These symptoms can manifest as fatigue, irritability, appetite loss/increase, and bouts of energy loss. Other signs and symptoms could also look like hair loss, adult onset acne, and mood swings. This is why it is very important to have your hormone levels checked out; especially when the fatigue and low energy start affecting your normal range of activity level.
#3 An Injury
Injuries while parenting happen a great deal. We trip over strollers, manage to walk into doors, and occasionally get hit in the head with sports equipment.
Having an injury can slow us down a great deal. It can affect our ability to spend quality time with our children. As a result, our children can be left feeling unwanted, rejected, and lonely. While we don’t aim to do make them feel that way, the little ones don’t always know how to cope with an injured parent’s inabilities to actively parent.
For example, I used to love jumping on the trampoline with my littles. Then one crazy afternoon, I tripped at the supermarket and fell on my knee. Falling like that took me out for months but instead of seeing a physician right away, I postponed my self-care. Like most mothers, we tend to think we can handle our own injuries. Unfortunately, I ended up in a cast for six months and it cost me a whole year of quality time with my girls.
Injuries require attention by doctors, even the minor ones. Though we are busy, we should also never assume that an injury is minor. So, the next time you trip or fall, explore your rehabilitative options with a doctor whether it be for a knee replacement service or something smaller, because they will get you back on your feet so you can spend more time with your kids.
#4 Work/Life Balance
Next, you should think about your work/life balance. It’s possible that your work is taking up far more time than you would like. This is true for a lot of people because on average, we spend one-third of our lives working. When you take into account sleep and the time spent fighting traffic, this can mean that we spend more time at work than we do with our kids.
One of the ways that you can deal with this is by exploring freelancing. If you freelance, you’re always going to have a far more flexible work schedule that will be in your favor. Another way to create a better work/life balance is starting your own small business such as a physical store or an online shop. Whether it’s being a freelancer or a small business owner, you’ll be your own boss and you will be the one who dictates your schedule.
#5 Commute
Commuting to and from work doesn’t seem like a big deal, but it does impact the amount of time we get with our kids.
If you think about it, the little ones go to sleep around seven. So, if you’re getting back around 6, then you only have an hour before they have to go to bed. By that time, they’re probably moody or over-tired, which leads to tantrums and stressful time together. Time together should be none of that!
Even teenagers feel the weight of your time away and most will bury their heads in social media and try to avoid eye contact with you as much as possible. So, that’s why it’s in your best interest to make sure that you are not living too far away from where you work. It’s another reason why freelancing and owning your own business can be the best option as a parent. I know it saved my kids from having an absent mother.
The Takeaway
Understanding some of the issues that impact the time you get with your kids is critical to ensuring quality time together. If you implement just one or two of the steps in this guide, then maybe you won’t miss out on some of the precious years. Unfortunately, those years tend to pass us by without us fully being aware of it happening.
