Mom Minutes are long. And hard. And exhausting. But a gift. These moments will pass quickly; don’t waste time wishing for the next season of our lives to come.
by Jordan Paul
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In the Special Theory of Relativity, Einstein determined that time is relative—in other words, the rate at which time passes depends on your frame of reference. Two different people may be looking at the same clock but they won’t always agree on how the minute “seemed” or how long it took. Which leads me to my new scientific discovery… The Theory of Mom Minutes.
Mom Minutes… they’re not just regular minutes. They are 60 seconds in nature but in the same time that it takes for my husband to stir the sugar in his coffee, I have simultaneously filled two water bottles, made two different breakfasts, braided hair, changed a diaper, and told Alexa to entertain us while I finished washing the dishes from the night before. Moms do not have the luxury of allowing time to pass without jamming it full of multitasked endeavors. There is simply too much to do and literally too little time.
My husband and I were recently discussing-more like bickering-about our new hobbies and the time they take. We were trying to justify our time away from our household responsibilities by proving that one of us was always gone longer than the other (me) and that one of us always had a harder time with the kids (me). “But I’m only gone one hour,” says husband, “and you are gone three.” The lightbulb moment was me explaining that just because the time is shorter doesn’t make the task any easier. My one hour with the kids could be miserable, while his three hours with them could be pleasant, easy, and fun.
And if I’m being completely honest, I’m jealous and frustrated that it seems like I always get the worst version of our kids, while he gets the best. In the hour of his absence, which seemed like a lifetime, I am chased, and pulled, and torn, and grabbed, and screamed at cyclically. The hour ends with one of us bleeding, one of us crying, and one of us sitting in the corner eating snacks. Typically, I’m all three. But while I’m gone? Oh, well, he gets two little girls eating popcorn in his lap while they watch a movie. I walk in the door with a greeting of, “oh, you’re back already?!”
Mom Minutes are long. And hard. And exhausting. But a gift.
1. Stop wishing the Mom Minutes away.
Everything is temporary. The chaos of raising kids will soon subside. Soon our arms will be empty, the house will be quiet, our cars will be clean, and the bottoms of our purses won’t be sticky. We have so much love to give and I think that’s why we find ourselves going a mile a minute. We have so much to do in the short amount of time we are given, that there’s no other way to squeeze it all in. So much of us is poured into our children in the craziness of day-to-day-life. The moments will pass quickly on their own; don’t waste the time by wishing for the next season of our lives to come.
2. You are irreplaceable.
There is no one who can translate for your toddler the way you can. No one who can carry three kids at once in the store, while checking produce freshness the way you can. No one who can kiss away a boo-boo or tuck them in like you can. The demands of motherhood are so vast and complex. That’s why our arms are made to hug so wide, our kisses made to penetrate so deep, and our love made to spread so equally. Our children know that there is only one person who can do it all. MOM
3. Find REST in the Mom Minutes.
Before you get caught up in the tornado of the day, quiet your mind, look around, and breathe it all in. The kids are running around but they’re happy and safe. Your house is a mess but the kids feel “at home.” The toys that are thrown all over the floor are evidence of a child’s imagination at work. The calendar is full with play-dates and practices but your kids know friendship. No matter how you move throughout the day, it’s going to pass quickly and chaotically. Enjoy the serenity of being an observer in the beautiful life you’re providing to your kids.
Okay, enough. There’s a lot to do, Mom. And your husband needs more sugar in his coffee.