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Discover valuable tips for finding balance in motherhood and fulfilling your own desires while being there for your children. Embrace self-care, set boundaries, and seek support.
by Kimberly Pangaro
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Becoming a mother is a transformative experience, but often we are faced with the notion that our individual identities must take a backseat to motherhood. However, denying our own desires and needs can ultimately hinder our ability to be the loving and patient mothers we strive to be. So, how can we achieve the delicate balance between fulfilling our own desires and being there for our children? In this article, we’ll explore valuable tips for finding that equilibrium, from making time for ourselves to setting boundaries and seeking support. Join us as we embark on a journey of self-discovery as moms and learn how to have it all without compromising our happiness and fulfillment.
Can We Really Have It All?
When we become mothers, we are often told that we have to give up our individual identities and desires in order to be good mothers. We are told that we should put our children first, and that our own needs and wants are secondary.
But what happens when we deny ourselves what we want? What happens when we try to be the perfect mother, even if it means sacrificing our own happiness?
As it turns out, denying what we want as individuals can actually hurt our motherhood. When we are not happy and fulfilled, it is harder to be patient and loving with our children. We are more likely to be stressed and resentful, and this can lead to negative interactions with our kids.
So what can we do? How can we be good mothers without sacrificing our own needs?
The answer is simple: we need to find a balance. We need to find ways to be mothers without losing ourselves. We need to find ways to be happy and fulfilled, even with the demands of motherhood.
Tips for Finding Balance:
Make time for yourself.
This may seem like a luxury, but it is essential for your mental and emotional health. Make sure you pencil into your planner time each day to do something you enjoy, whether it is reading, taking a bath, or going for a walk.
Set boundaries.
It is important to set boundaries with your children and with others. Let them know what you are willing and not willing to do. This will help you avoid feeling overwhelmed and resentful.
Don’t be afraid to ask for help.
Finding balance means having no shame in asking for help from your partner, family, or friends. They can give you a break when you need it, and they can help you with childcare and other tasks.
Don’t compare yourself to other mothers.
Every mother is different, and every child is different. There is no one right way to be a mother. Just do your best, and don’t worry about what other people are doing.
Motherhood is a beautiful and rewarding journey, but it is also challenging. It is important to remember that you are not alone. There are many other mothers who are going through the same things you are. So don’t be afraid to reach out for help and support.
And remember, it is okay to want things for yourself. It is okay to have dreams and goals. In fact, it is essential for your own happiness and well-being. So don’t deny yourself what you want. Find a way to have it all.
Learn the Art of Saying No.
Saying no is similar to setting boundaries, and it helps in finding balance, yet different in that it requires you to be firm in your choices without fail. Boundaries, even once set, are flexible because we don’t often put enough power in them. However, the word NO has all the power it needs when heard. You can say NO as often you need to, for any reason and any request. You don’t have to feel guilty when you say it, just be sure you mean it when you say it.
Things You Can Do to Feel Like You Have It All:
- Become a writer and write about your experiences as a mother. This will allow you to express yourself and connect with other mothers.
- Take a pottery class or join a book club. Having hobbies outside of motherhood will help you stay sane and have something to look forward to.
- Go on a date night with your partner once a month. This will give you a chance to reconnect and remind each other why you fell in love.
- Get a career that you’re in love with. Don’t waste away at a job that you hate just to pay the bills. Find the value you offer, and get hired by a company who values you.
- Take a nap every day. This is essential for your physical and mental health.
- Read a book every now and again. It’s so important to expand our knowledge beyond motherhood.
- Start your own business. Feel the freedom of being your own boss and working by your own rules.
- Volunteer. Helping those who are in need is a great way to give back and connect with those around you.
- Make new friends. Have a group of friends to hang out with is a necessity as it allows you to have an additional level of support.
- Care for a pet. If your children are grown, and you feel lonely, it might be a good idea to get pet so you can share spend time caring for another living being.
In Conclusion
If you’re a mom in search of finding balance, self-discovery, and a fulfilling life, embracing these tips for finding balance is key. By prioritizing self-care, setting boundaries, and seeking support, you can navigate the beautiful but challenging journey of motherhood while staying true to yourself.
Remember, there is no one-size-fits-all approach to being a mother, so don’t compare yourself to others. Instead, focus on your own happiness and well-being. Embrace your dreams and desires, and don’t be afraid to take unconventional paths, such as becoming a writer or starting a blog, to connect with other moms. Engaging in hobbies, nurturing your relationships, and prioritizing rest also contribute to a harmonious and fulfilling mom-life. Trust in your ability to learn, grow, and find your unique path to having it all.